The fight I never got to have

 I don't like to highlight the moments in which John and I don't see eye -to- eye.   Mostly because it doesn't happen often that we don't agree, and when we do, it usually turns out that I'm right anyways.  And who wants to brag right?  

But here is a little story for ya.  It is titled:

 "The Day my Husband Betrayed Me."

One day, one measly week ago, John looked at Nathan and noticed that our bald little baby had indeed begun to sprout some actual hair.    Not just little baby fuzz, but actual bonafide hair.   I was thrilled!  John was not.  Instantly, he set his jaw firm and square and vowed to give Nate a haircut as soon as possible.

Well, I don't like to fight, but I must admit, I absolutely put my foot down.   I mean the kid barely even has any hair and John wants to go cut the precious little bit of it off?   Who am I - if not my child's advocate?  Right?   I tried to argue diplomatically and give John a chance to explain why, WHY on earth should our little boy not get to have a head full of  hair like everybody else.  

John's explanation:   (Something along the lines of,)   "blah ...it just looks shaggy....blah....Don't you remember that talk President Hinckley once gave in which he discouraged boys from dressing too casual and ..sloppy...blah blah blah, and do we want sloppy and casual kids...blah blah blah, ...then why even set the precedence...blah blah blah. "

My Rebuttal:    "Uh...but...He's ONE!!!     And let's be serious, it's not like I'm trying to pierce his ears or slap a tattoo on him or anything.    I just want to see what one of my boys would look like with hair.   I mean for real, what if there is some adorable natural curl lurking there and we have no clue?    Besides, winter is coming, and it would only help to keep his head warm right?" (I was totally going for practical with that last part)

All in all, I thought my argument was not only valid, but superior to John's.   Still,  his handsome jaw remained firmly set.  So I took a different, more desperate approach.  I begged John, literally BEGGED him to give me ONE MONTH to just enjoy Nate's cute little fuzzy hair.    One itty bitty month, and  then John could cut it as much as he pleased.

Sounds fair right?     That - was barely over a week ago, and I can not tell you how much I have been looking forward to actually being able to rub some gel into Nate's little locks this coming Sunday and finally style it a bit.  

Well,  tonight the kids and I were having dinner without John, when I glanced over at Nate and it hit me like a load of bricks.    Something was different.  Something was very wrong,  and I could not believe that I had not noticed sooner.  

Do you know what I noticed?

Nate had NO HAIR!!!!     John had cut it!   After only 1 week- John had buzzed all that cute wispy feathery hair right off!!!

And behind my back even!   I honestly don't even know when he found the time to do it, or how he was able to do it without me knowing - but somehow gosh darnit- that wiley little coyote actually cut Nate's hair!      

(Don't let this photo fool you.   Nate is just as ANGRY about it as I am.)

I tell ya, that John is tricky.  Sure, he's handsome, I'll give ya that, but the man is NOT to be trusted.

He'd just better not be surprised if I bring Nate home with a nice TATOO!

I'm thinking "MOM" would look nice!

One Year Already

It is a little bit difficult for me to admit that it has already been 12 months!    1 year ago today I was in a hospital room holding a brand new baby.  MY baby.    Pregnancy with him had been long... so, so long, and I remember so many times promising to anybody and everybody that "this was the LAST time I was going to go through that pregnancy garbage."    Then one day it was over, and he was here.   9 lbs 3 ounces of pure sweetness!   That first week home with Nate was a rough one, as the same day that we brought Nate home our other three kids came down with the Swine Flu.   For TWO weeks we all had to wear face masks around him and I remember how badly I wanted to bring him close to me and kiss his little face- but couldn't.   
                                        



Oh, but what a dream baby he has been!   He has been a happy, smiley boy from day 1, and we could not have possibly enjoyed an easier first year than what we've just enjoyed. 
He LOVES to talk to people, and spends most of his days merrily following his older siblings around.   He is running now, eating everything, and flashing his gorgeous smile to anyone who looks his way.   

I shudder to think that I ever whined about carrying this special little boy.    Recently we were told  that we should not have any more kids.   Instantly I wanted to take back every complaint I ever made.    What's a measly 9 months anyways?

 I'd do it a hundred times more for another Nate!

Happy Birthday Nathan!

We love you!

                                 

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Things you hope the neighbors don't see, and why I love the Birthday Boy

Do you ever have those moments when you do something dumb and worry if the neighbors saw?    Like, for example, one time I caught myself yelling at the kids, like grouch mother yelling, only to realize afterwards that the windows were wide open.    You know- that kind of thing.  

Well- I had one of those moments again this past week. It happened last Saturday night as we were getting ready to leave for the Adult Session of our Stake Conference. John had been away all day and came home just minutes before we were supposed to leave again. He was rushing to get ready, and I needed to go get the sitter. Normally that would not be a big deal, but on this particular day I was tired. Not a normal tired - but a new kinda tired. Stiff. Sore. Swollen. Tired. I really did not want to drive all the way to the other side of town to pick up the sitter, but somehow I managed to lumber out to the van.     As I was slowly backing out of the garage I hit the button which triggers our garage door to close.     It is at this moment that I felt a thud, and heard the sickening sound of crushing metal. Clearly I was hitting something behind me. I craned my sore neck to see what it possibly could be.

Our truck.

The only choice I had was to pull back into the garage. But wait a minute- the garage door was coming down. Ahhhh! Panic Hit, and I put the van in reverse again. Only to feel that awful thud, and hear that sickening sound of metal.

Darn that truck!

I was stuck. Stuck between an old red Chevy and a Closing Garage Door. I had nowhere to go.   And then I heard the still small voice in the back of my mind.   It was the softest, faintest voice ever, but I clearly heard it.

It said... "Your neighbors can totally see this."

I burst into to tears, and then finally did something smart.   I reached for the garage door opener and hit the button, sending the door upwards again and making it possible for me to navigate away our van away from our stupid, dumb, and always in my way - truck.

Now there is only one reason why I am even daring to tell this story, and it is this. Because as I sat there wondering what to do - I looked up in the rear view mirror and saw John.    There he was, standing in our driveway almost ready for the meeting, with a look of complete bewilderment. I gripped the steering wheel, unsure of how he was going to react.

 And do you know what he did?

He looked at the van for a moment. Then he looked me. Then he looked at the van again and said, "Hun It's just a scratch," and he went back in the house to finish getting ready.

He has not mentioned it again.  Not once!

And as for that "Scratch"? Well - there are actually TWO "Scratches",  and I'm pretty sure that I could fit my head into one of them!

Which brings me to the point of this entire post today. 

  Today is JOHN's BIRTHDAY!!!  

(yup he's a Halloween Baby- freaky eh!)  

I've spent the past week wondering how I could possibly convey to him all of the love and gratitude that I feel for him.   Not only is he the best Dad ever, but he is my Best friend.   I have felt that more then ever over the past few months.  As I have felt unwell, John has truly stepped in and made up for it all.   When it was difficult for me to even move my arms - he carried everything.   When I couldn't walk easily- he ran all of the errands.   When I couldn't find any reason to feel hopeful - he was optimistic.    When I do something completely stupid and clumsy - he doesn't rub it in and hold it against me.

He literally makes up for what I lack, and builds me up in the process.

In his 35 years of life he has figured out how to be EVERYTHING that I need. 

  And that is how I know that he is MY better half.

So how do you celebrate someone who means everything to you?

I'm hoping it is with a pan of homemade Chicken Cordon Bleu and a Carrot Cake in the shape of, get this ...

A GHOST!

Now, if that doesn't say true love, I don't know what will!

Pajama Boy, Taylor Swift, and the only brown dodge Caravan in town with ...two dents!

Wow is it really the end of October?   Really?      The weather sure hasn't been acting like it is- we've been spoiled with beautiful temperatures that have made up for the chilly summer we had.   At least I for one have forgiven whoever it is that plans the weather.  This has been nice!   I think the only indication to me  that October is almost over is the awareness that one of our most favorite holidays EVER is quickly approaching.   Well..I for one, think it is one of the Best Holidays ever and the kids seem to agree with me.  

We've narrowed down what each of the kids are going to dress up as, and more then once I have seen them running around the cul-de sac dressed up as if it was already Halloween night.  Several times in the past couple of weeks I have looked out the window to see  Spider man, A witch, a princess and their neighborhood friend walking from door to door with hands full of some sort of treat they collected.    Our neighbors are just too darn nice!

Only when you are young and cute can you get away with Trick or Treating multiple times throughout the month!

I'm still trying to sort out the logistics of John's Halloween costume.   Every year he tells me that he doesn't care what he goes as...but this year he had an idea that I actually think would be perfect for him.  It's right up his alley.     I should really just let him go with it and create the costume himself- but I made that mistake this past week when his school had a "pajama day."     I sat back and watched as he went to school looking like this:

Actually I didn't sit back and just watch.  I tried to stop him - I honestly did.   However, when John first began teaching, years ago,  he decided that his personal dress standard would entail a tie and dress shirt each day.     Apparently this rule applies always...even on Pajama Day!!!     (For the record, I know John looks a little bit annoyed to be having his picture taken but that is only because I told him I was going to post it on the blog and humiliate him!  Bwahahahah!)    

Oh I LOVE this man, I really do.     But I'm officially designating myself in charge of his Halloween costume.   Believe me -there will be NO TIE involved!!!!     Stay tuned.....


Other news to report:  

 Brent and Rachel came out on Friday for a few hours and it was so fun to visit with them.    It is crazy to think that Rachel is about to have a BABY!!!      And can you believe it?  At 9 months pregnant...Aunt Rach and Uncle Brent took my kids golfing!!!!     Alright, actually they just took Abby and Sam golfing.  (Like I'd allow Rach to take ALL my kids.   She's about to have a baby for goodness sake!)     Sam officially has found a new best friend in Brent, despite the fact that Sam continuously calls him "dumb Rat!"   I think it has become a term of endearment really, and I admit, I allow it- because really Brent eggs him on.   Thanks Brent and Rach!


I am happy to report that I cleaned my house this week AND baked cupcakes!!!     I'm going to take that as a sign that life is beginning to feel more normal.     John was happy to discover that for the first time in four months- the fresh baked smell that wafted through the house did not come from a Scentsy candle for once.   He hugged and kissed me and acted like I was superwoman or something.    And that is when I vowed to never stop baking ever again.   Ever.    


Oh yes and I must share this story with you.     Abby came to me a few weeks ago and reported that Taylor Swift is her new favorite Rock Star!   I laughed out loud at that because I have not heard her ever speak of Taylor Swift before, nor have I ever heard her refer to someone as a Rock star.   In fact,  as far as I knew- she still loved the Wiggles.    Well over the past couple of weeks I have caught Abby several times singing one of Swift's songs.  

One day as I heard her sing, I decided to be a nice mom, and pay her a compliment.
 I said, "Wow Abby.  You sound really good."  (which, by the way, she didn't)
Abby replied.  "I know.   I totally sound just like the real Taylor Swift.  Even Ava and Mya think so."

Well that was it.   Since then, I've made it my mission to capture Abby's prize winning rendition on video.    Because, you know, it is going to be important to show something like this right before her first date or at her wedding or during some future family reunion when her own kids will be able to sit back and laugh at her.     I imagine we will get a kick out of this for years and years ...and YEARS to come.      


Well that's pretty much been our week.  I know that it might appear as thought I've spent the week making fun of my family, but seeing as I still can not walk normally AND I put TWO dents in our van this week...

....I'm all about highlighting whatever takes the attention off of me.



Enough said.

HAPPY SUNDAY!


ABBY SINGING IN THE SHOWER:

Dreaming of the Day...

This past week was a busy week!     (Does it seem as though all of my entries recently begin with that statement?) So many times John and I have crawled into bed and with tired voices and in the few split seconds that exist before we fall asleep one of us mumbles something along the lines of ..."It isn't always going to be like this."   Perhaps that is John's way of trying to reassure me that he isn't always going to be this busy.    Perhaps it is my way of trying to reassure John that I am not always going to be this pathetic.    Whatever the reason, it is a promise we attempt to give each other that one day...life will be calm again.

This week, for John, was FULL of meetings, volleyball practices, and special school events. There have been some nights in which he literally walks into the house for dinner, eats standing up, and leaves again, not to be seen until well past 10!   This past weekend he was away at his second Volleyball Tournament of the season.   Sadly,  he came home a little bit bummed out that they did not place - but they'll surely do better next time.     And guess what?   Only TWO more tournaments before the season draws to a close. I know that John enjoys coaching, and yeah yeah I'm happy for him and all that.    But believe me when I say, I am DREAMING of the day when he walks through the door at 5:00 and is home to stay!   I tell ya, it's tough stuff putting kids to bed alone.    Odds are always better when it is two against four!

The kids, on the other hand, will likely miss the little bus rides they sometimes get when John returns from an away game.    Often before John returns the bus he'll pick up the kids and take them on a surprise ride around the block.   I think he just does it to solidify in their minds that fact that he is the "coolest Dad EVER!"


I had an appointment this week in Calgary, and was so relieved to learn from the rheumatologist that things are improving.    She showed me some blood work results which indicate that the inflammatory response my body has been going through is beginning to subside.    I practically KISSED the woman - I was so relieved to hear that!     I have admittedly felt an increase in energy and overall well being, but I  so often get discouraged (and down right depressed!)  about all of the things that I still can NOT do.      My doctor was very encouraging though, and assured me that this takes time, and in the whole scheme of things, THREE months of pain is really not that long and likely not enough time to permanently damage joints.      In fact, she was very confident that I will get back to the way I was before this whole flare up even hit.   Believe me,   I have spent every free minute since that appointment DREAMING of the days ahead:     What will it be like to be able to walk normally again?    Or ride my bike with the kids?      Or how nice it will be to be able to go buy milk at the store and not come home with ankles as swollen and big as Nate's head!    Or to be able to open my mouth wide enough to bite into an apple again....or to be able to yell at my kids without it hurting....   (kidding...sorta)

Oh I can't Wait!        I know that this is something I will always live with now, but I do feel as though  the worst is behind us.    (Fingers Crossed.)


This little guy is putting us through our paces this week.     It is hard to believe that in just a couple of short weeks Nate will be 1!        A Whole YEAR already!    Could you not just eat him up?

Sure, he is cute, but  Boy oh Boy is he busy!     He's reached that stage where he must and I do mean MUST be walking at ALL times.     He learned to walk a couple of months ago, and he has barely stopped to rest.     This works out great on a normal typical day as I've not had to carry him around much at all.     He sort of just wanders around the house destroying something here, or making a mess over there.     Always Happy.     Always Content.     Unfortunately, Sunday always seems to come along, and for a few tedious hours we try to hold him down, just a bit, while we attempt to get something out of our church meetings.    It takes a LOT of work to keep Nate sitting happily for that amount of time.     In fact, it takes about two bottles, one sippy cup of milk, a bag of fishy crackers, a bag of pretzels, a bag of mini marshmallows (for desperate moments), 5 finger puppets, lots of random toys, my set of keys and a plethora of items from my bag that frankly really aught to stay deep down in my bag.      

All of that usually gets me through the first 10 minutes of Relief Society.   After that - we can usually be found walking the halls.

Needless to say I have spent several moments Dreaming of the Day that all Moms in my position dream of. That's right - NURSERY!!!   Only 6 1/2 months away now;)

Deep down I know that what I need to do is STOP DREAMING and enjoy the place we are at.     Right now.  

 I know that one day I will look back and remember with fondness the moments that we are living now. Like the excitement the kids have when John surprisingly arrives home before they've fallen asleep, thus giving them an excuse to get out of bed. Because really, who can resist a goodnight hug from Daddy?

I know that I will one day look back and wish for my kids to all be little again.   I'll probably remember nothing about irreverent Sundays, cheesy stains on my dress,  and exhausting efforts to keep them happy.

Who knows. Maybe one day I'll look back and long for a time when the only thing that caused me pain was ...arthritis.

It's weird, but when I stop to think about it, it really sinks in. 

  We are living the  "Good Old Days" this very minute!

And believe me - our Days are SO GOOD!

Happy Sunday!!!

So much to be Thankful For

Wow what a busy couple of weeks it has been! John has been swamped as usual, but we took great comfort this week in knowing that we are officially half way through the volleyball season!   Even better - we are now enjoying a beautiful long weekend, thanks to the Thanksgiving Holiday!!     We plan to enjoy it by doing absolute nothing.at.all.    As in, Not a thing!

Though, I might pause from our current state of nothingness, to reflect occasionally on how truly blessed my family and I get to be.

 ************

This past week, we stumbled across a most amazing and handy invention.   Some how we discovered that we can literally control SAM by using a small wireless, (albeit imaginary) remote control.   We call it the "Sam remote", and It's Fantastic!   All we do is point this invisible contraption at Sam and state our wish, and he obeys perfectly.   Of course, Sam's motivation to comply with these orders is based entirely on that fact that we are having fun at his expense and that all eyes are exactly where he wants them to be.   On him.  What can I say?  He likes to make people laugh!      Abby's favorite button is Rewind, which she always seems to use whenever Sam wipes out or does something silly that she'd like to see repeated.     Fast Forward is wonderful as it makes Sam work much quicker at any given task then he normally would have.  But  personally, my favorite button on this Sam Remote- has been the MUTE button.   Sam just walks around mouthing words without ever really speaking them!    Needless to say, we have been enjoying a new level of peace and quiet around here.  And I am thankful for that!

This week I won a prize for the first time, in ...well, probably my whole life!     Alright, so technically I didn't really win.     In reality... I LOST.  (but that's not how I'm choosing to look at it right now.)   On Thursday I received word that a photo I had taken titled "Exiting the Cave" had won honorable mention in a photo contest.   I was excited that this particular picture was recognized, as I took it while hiking Crypt back in July.    Not only was that day one of my favorite days ever spent with John, but it was also the last day that I got to live without arthritis.   I tell ya, Ignorance really is bliss.    But now look at me!    Sittin' pretty with a $50 gift card to enjoy at Vimy's.   I can be Thankful for that!

You can go here  (Experience Waterton Photo Contest) to see the winning photos!

A couple of weeks ago, my sister watched the kids for me so that I could go on my annual fall drive.   The leaves in Waterton were STUNNING and I remember feeling so rejuvenated and positively grateful for the beautiful life that surrounds me.    I definitely feel Thankful to get to live where we do!

Check out Not Quite Picasso if you at all want to see my favorite fall photos from that day!

And as if I've not mentioned Waterton enough in this weekly post, I thought I'd share some photos and footage from our drive out there a few days ago.   This time of year the Elk come down low and gather in a large field as you enter Waterton.   It is always a highlight for us to go out and watch these animals.

There is something about watching Wildlife in their own natural habitat that is very breathtaking, made that much better when surrounded by my cherished husband and kids (and one cute neighbor) while snacking on milk and cookies. I'm always Very Thankful for evenings like that!




Well, It`s official.    I don't think John and I could be any more blessed then we are.    We feel so fortunate to have the wonderful families that we do.  Lately it has become so apparent to me that not only do we get to have the most amazing families, but we also happen to live among and associate on a daily basis with some of the best most kindest people ever!   I don't know how we got to be so lucky in life, but I Thank God for that every single day!

 To all of you that we know and love,  from our Family to yours...

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

~A quick clip of the Elk for you to enjoy~

Happy Birthday Crystal!

Last week my little sister celebrated her 29th birthday. It’s sort of a Happy thought to me to think that 29 years ago I became a BIG sister. Finally I had somebody to which I could dispel all of my knowledge and superior experience to. Truth be told though- that one year meant very little when it comes to Crystal and I as we really are two peas in a pod in so many ways. Yes that's right- Crystal is her name. I have a sister named Jewel, and a sister named Crystal. Isn't that great? "Two beautiful priceless little gems," I can picture my parents saying when each of them were born. And then there was me. .....Tanis.

(The whole name thing didn’t really help with the middle child syndrome I had as a kid- but that's ok, I'm good with it now.)

It was my intention this year to wish a special Happy Birthday to each of my siblings on their birthdays, by embarrassing them a bit here on the old blog. I feel ashamed that I did not have this post ready for Crystals actual birthday- but better late then never right? So without further ado- some things about my sister that a lot of people may not know:

• When Crystal was little she used to collect the strangest things. She had hundreds of stuffed animals, that she housed in a small room underneath our basement stairs.
• She also collected gummy bears. As in the candy. She would save each and every gummy bear she was ever given and would even make toilet paper clothing for them.
• Crystal LOVES animals and was always rescuing some sort of creature. She once saved the ugliest little newborn mice ever and fed them with a dropper. They had NO HAIR!!!
• Crystal can sing a pretty mean version of Whitney Houston’s “I will Always Love You,” though you might have to get her into a yellow Jeep in order to hear her let loose like that

• I used to make Crystal lay beside me at night and rub/tickle my arm. And bless her heart-she would!
• Two of the most valuable lessons I’ve ever learned in my life - I learned from her. Once as we went on a late night drive to look at the comet Hale-Bopp, and another time as we sat in a canoe on Wabamum lake fishing together.
• Crystal and I went on a high school marine biology course/trip while we were both in High School. Some of the neatest things I’ve ever seen in nature- I saw with her.

• Crystal is the only one in my family who has a University Degree. I have a mere diploma (which my Dad would have said does not really count)!
• Crystal has done some amazing things with her Environmental/Tree Hugger Degree. She has worked with Owls (and can tell you how EVERY owl sounds), birds, she studied Ground Squirrels in Utah and has been a part of Studies in the Great Bear Rain forests of BC! Get this- she has worked with someone who worked with DAVID SAZUKI! AHHHH Right? She has literally sat on a Rock during a Salmon run and watched as BEARS fed on fish right beside her!
• Crystal and I lived together as Young Single Adults in Edmonton. It’s probably during that time that she became not just my sister but my Friend.
• Crystal is an Old Soul. Her style is truly one of kind. She bonds with the Elderly really well (wink wink), and she is not the type to bend her character just to impress. She is so much wiser then her age in so many ways.

Perhaps the most wonderful thing about Crystal that I could share is that she is a selfless person with a good heart. This past summer has been rough for me. ( Have I mentioned that yet?) Being told that I have a type of Rheumatoid Arthritis has for some reason shaken me to the core. I’ve worried too much about all sorts of things that I know I can’t change. Last week Crystal dropped everything and came to stay with us for several days. She brought her two little kids and her pregnant belly and came to be with me! Her and Jewel filled my freezer with meals. Crystal listened to my fears, she reassured me, and she didn’t judge me when I threw my tantrums. She would lay beside me just like she used to when we were younger, and for some reason just having her around was such a comfort. I don’t know what I’d do without my Siblings!!!

Tonight I came across some letters that Crystal had written years ago as she was backpacking through one of her crazy wildlife adventures. As I read through this letter tonight it brought me to tears as I realized that her advice to me 10 years ago applies so much more to me now then it ever did back then.

Here is part of what she wrote:

“Tanis, today as we were driving to work there was an old man walking down the highway with a huge sign sticking out of his backpack which read, “LOVE LIFE.” So badly I wanted to stop the car and talk to this man that LOVED LIFE. I realized how much I get caught up in life and forget to live. This simple, old stranger, alone on the highway, was a good reminder to me that we have to make the most out of our lives. Don’t let life pass you by. Love it! Don’t forget to live. Don’t forget to laugh. And don’t forget to love those around you. These things, I think, are the formula to Happiness.”

See what I mean.
I am so glad to have such a Wise Little Sister!

Happy Birthday Crystal! I hope it was as Special as you are!

On Tuesday I decided to take a drive to Waterton to see how orange the leaves were.   On the way I stopped to take this picture.  I loved the low lying clouds, and something about the hay bails made me happy.   It was such a chilly day I half expected it to SNOW!

Waterton was beautiful as always - though the trees are not nearly as vibrant as they will be in a week or two.

This next couple of pictures- I LOVE.  I know that the photos are blurry and poor quality but I snuck these shots one night at bed time.  I peeked into Abby's room to find Nate snuggled up next to Abby while she read him a story.   It melted my heart!

And then Nate noticed me watching them and flashed me the happiest smile Ever!  That was it - I fell in love with him for the umpteenth time!

One morning this week,  as we were loading Abby's lunch into her back pack I found this:  

Such a happy looking ...um... "paperclip/candy wrapper/gumball man!"   I LOVED it, and felt so proud of her creative inventions.   (Perhaps she takes after her cousin Mya in that way hey Jewel?) 

I had to post this picture of our house as it was when we purchase it almost a year ago.    Actually, I think I took this photo before we even finalized the deal, back when I used to drive through the cul- de- sac several times a day and pray that our little trailer would sell so that we could make this place "ours."    Anyways, this is how it looked then.  Notice the big Rock on the lawn.

That Rock always drove me crazy.  In fact I phoned several contractors in town and begged them to have it - just take it off our lawn.  It just seemed to be a hazard to me as I imagined it becoming a diving board for Sam or something even more wreckless. 

This is our house now, or at least as of Tuesday.   Back in the spring John made me some lattice frames and secured them to the house, so that we could transplant some clematis vines.    We also cut around the rock and thanks to my father in law, as well as some wonderful neighbors and friends in the ward we have accumulated a beautiful array of perennials this year.    All of the flowers are transplants from others!  (Well except for the Dogwood Bush on the far right.  That baby I found down by the Creek and made John to go dig it up for me.   It makes me feel a tad bit Redneck when I think of that.  (I hope that it was a legal thing to do.   ...For John's sake that is) 

Sam and all of the kids naturally LOVE to play on the Rock just as I feared, only now they have an ample supply of flowers to destroy as well.  So, smart thinking on my part eh?  

Oh and Just for Kicks I thought I'd post this picture of our cozy little home taken on Friday!  We woke up to a blanket of snow and fat falling flakes.  The kids were on cloud 9!  And I have to confess, I was pretty happy about it too.   We are probably the only family in town that was glad to see Snow!   We played Christmas music while enjoying snow man shaped pancakes!  

I'm sure all of our loved ones living far away from here are so wishing they could be with us right now!

Other events from this week: For John it has been one filled with meetings, volleyball and Young Mens. For Abby - the beginning of piano lessons (year TWO!) which we are so excited about!    For Sam- this was officially his SECOND week of earning a dollar store toy for good behavior at school. This week his prize came in the form of a bow an arrow which he says he will use to kill a bear with.     Jessica has adjusted to mornings without Sam and Abby around, and has even sat down and painted with me a time or two.   Nate has had some rough nights with a sharp little molar trying to make it's way into his cute little mouth. If only all the teeth could just come in once so we could be done with it. He's just not himself.

We enjoyed seeing John's brother Ben, his wife Kat and their little doll of a daughter Marilyn this past weekend.    We enjoyed going to the temple together and I was able to show off my stellar coordination on several different occasions.  Yes Kat- I really am that clumsy! 

All in all it was a week of accomplishments for those that I love most.   

 How did I get to be so lucky? 

Army tanks, green beens and other random thoughts

I have to rave about Sam for a moment. A week ago him and I sat down and we set a goal together. And when I say we "set a goal together" - I mean I bribed him. At any rate, we agreed that if he could be polite and behave while at school for an entire week then he could chose a Toy on the weekend. Well...he DID IT!!!! Every afternoon when I would pick up Sam from School I would ask his teacher how he was that day and each and every day she told me he had been just GREAT! Yahoo!!!! This was such a relief to me, mostly because it confirms to me something that I have always known about my son. Sam is perfectly capable of controlling his own behaviour.

He'd just doesn't always want to - that's all. ;)

Needless to say, John took him down to the local dollar store and Sam came home a very happy man with a cheap army tank transformer in his little hand. He earned it!

That's not to say he doesn't still have his moments. When he is not at school, he continues to make us laugh with his crazy ninja moves, monkey imitations, and methods of torture that he chooses to inflict on both of his sisters. Oddly enough though, I'm Ok with that!


Nate has been a bit sick this week. I've gone through the usual debate of "Is he sick? or is he Teething?" I never know. This morning though I finally got a glimpse inside his mouth and sure enough - he's got MOLARS coming up! Poor little bug. He's walking so much now, and has started to wave and clap even if nobody is around to praise him for it. It's been funny to watch him eat lately. For the most part he is a GREAT eater.However, put a pile of green beans on his tray and he has absolutely no time a day for them.

As in not interested at ALL. This usually results in a green heap of bean right below his feet.

I tell ya, he's lucky he is so cute!

My sister in law Rachel is expecting her first child (a BOY) in just a few short weeks. (Ok, who am I kidding - we all know that those last six weeks before a baby comes are the most tediously slow weeks ever.) On Saturday her husband's sister hosted a baby shower for her in Lethbridge. I enjoyed attending, and it was especially nice to get to visit with family and friends.

Lana pulled it off beautifully! I was so happy for Rach and excited for her new addition very soon (but really in like forever) and I can't wait to see Rach as a MOM. She will be such a good one.

I must confess I walked away feeling somewhat sheepish that I was not the one doing this for her. But that's alright, I could not have done as good of a job. Besides, I may not be the most supportive sister in law, but I'm determined to be a much better AUNT! I'm pretty sure all it will take is a whole lot of candy, and an endless supply of Dollar Store Toys. That seems to be my winning approach with kids lately;)


This has been a very hectic week for John. He's definitely adjusted to the back to school routine, and I think he is enjoying things. This week was extra busy however, as it consisted of stake young men's meetings, activities, and Volleyball commitments that were scheduled back to back or even in a couple of instances at the same time. This really had John scrambling and juggling. I remember one particular morning as John was saying good bye to the kids, he told them he would see them...um...well.. the next morning!! And sure enough the kids did not see him until the next day. (Not that they didn't fight me at bedtime and attempt to play the whole "please let us stay up late to see Daddy" card. The little punks!) John handles the busyness really well though, and we both know that things will calm down in a couple of months.

As far as things go for me, I am still waiting for this whole arthritis thing to clear up. It has been a bit frustrating that although things are improving, progress has been so.darn.slow. Still- things are improving! This is shaping out to be a very interesting and tutoring experience for me personally. One that has been both debilitating and facilitating all at the same time! On one hand I find myself wishing that I could just do all of the normal daily tasks that I used to do with such ease. From running, to eating to getting on my knees to pray - everything takes a little more time these days, and involves a little more ache then I'd prefer. On the other hand though, I feel that this is taking me in a direction spiritually, that I should have perhaps been going in a long time ago. It is almost as though this challenge has been tailor made to draw out all of my weakness and is making me change who I am and how I handle things. Definitely an exercise in patience. (And believe me, I have never had any desire to be patient before, so this is a good thing right?)

My thoughts keep going back to something my Bishop taught us in a combined Priesthood and Relief Society meeting a couple of weeks ago. In short, he cautioned us to not let ourselves get into a rut where we expect life to always be convenient, or comfortable, and certainly to not let those become factors that determine how we live our lives on a daily basis. His words have continued to resonate with me in a lot of ways. Not only that, but I've also had the sobering realization lately that there are people around me going through much worse. I don't mean that in an abstract "everybody has trials" sort of way but in a literal "people I know and care about are going down much more difficult paths then this" kind of way. More and more I find myself thanking God that this is ALL I have to deal with. Besides that, I always have the reassurance that this is all very Temporary.

That pretty much sums up this past week in our family. The leaves are beginning to turn yellow and I am anxiously dreaming of future drives out to Waterton. Waterton in the fall is stunning, and it isn't busy, so I feel like I get to enjoy the park all to myself! (What can I say, I'm greedy like that)

I absolutely LOVE the fall!

Thought for the Day

"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude. "

My thoughts on Sam

For the past few weeks I have worried so much about my oldest boy Sam. As the beginning of school approached this year, I found myself feeling more and more anxious about how he would fit into a structured school setting. To say he is a busy boy would be an understatement.

Take this past week for example. Last Friday after his first full week of school, I asked his Teacher how he`d done that week, genuinely expecting a positive report. Her response was kind and hesitant as she told me of some of his...um antics of the week. Like the time he went the entire morning acting like a monkey all because I'd sent a banana in his lunch!

My heart sank. As parents, it is natural for us to want our kids to go out into the world and you know, share their toys, sit still, and become successful in their own little realms right? And when they don`t behave quite up to par, it is difficult to not take it a little bit personally and wonder just where exactly things went wrong. Perhaps he really was dropped as a child?

In all honestly though, Sam is not a bad boy. Rather, he is a silly boy. He is a very silly boy who loves attention and enjoys, more then anything else, to have others laugh at him. And I don't know about you, but I`ve never met a show off who could stay quiet for long! Sometimes I worry that because he is soo silly, that he will not be taken seriously, by teachers, by classmates, ...or even by HIMSELF. Even worse then that, sometimes I worry that I will never really see the potential that is in him. Yet, other times I find myself wishing that I could just suppress his energetic side a little. Not indefinately, just between the hours of 8-3 when all that he says and does has the potential to reflect on me as a parent.


This past weekend, I spent a lot of time (and I mean a LOT) talking to Sam about manners, and trying to define with him boundaries and expectations for him while he is at school. I was THRILLED today when his teacher pulled me aside and told me that Sam was like a different boy today. So "calm and subdued". She said that she almost wondered if I had medicated him - he was that different. I don't know, perhaps I should be more open to the whole medication route, but I'm just not. In reality, I simply bribed him with a dollar store toy on Saturday if he can manage to be good every.single.day.this.week.


A tall order perhaps. But one I think he is capable of.

I feel in a way as though I am trying to retrain him, and I find myself hoping that he can blend in with the rest of the kids. Be a little less goofy. A little less....Sam.

Which brings me to this great TED talk that John and I love listening to. Sir Ken Robinson speaks about the need for a Learning Revolution. One in which we stop placing kids somewhere along a linear method of teaching and measuring and instead see them for who they are and can one day become. We do our kids a great disservice by trying to train them to be models of what we think the world needs. It has motivated John, as a teacher, to teach in a way that encourages his students to find their passions. It motivates me to look at Sam with more acceptance and tolerance.

Because let`s face it, Sam may always be that kid who acts silly just for laughs. He may always beat to the sound of a different drum, so to speak. I may spend countless more hours teaching him about the importance of manners and proper etiquette. Heck- I may very well spend the next 12 years making ``Good behaviour Charts`` and bribing him with dollar store rewards.


I have to be ok with that. More then that - I have to love him for it. Because who knows- with all that energy - he might just be the one who someday solves world hunger!

And then wouldn't I be so proud!!!






Enjoy this TED talk. Very Funny, and worth the 20 minutes!

Life Lesson #478,592

Sometimes when I sit down to journal about the Days in the life of my family I struggle to know how much of my life I should share. Do I only share the positive or funny moments? Do I share the bad days or leave them out? Do I write about those moments when I perhaps have not demonstrated my best self as far as Motherhood goes- or do I gloss over them and hope that my children don't remember those days down the road? After contemplating that thought over the past couple of weeks, I've realized that the premise of this blog was to do all of the above. To record the DAYS that happen in Our Lives! We are, after all, products of our own experiences now aren't we, and so I've determined that this post will be uncensored and will contain a synopsis of our recent experiences. The good, the bad, and the down right UGLY.

On that note- this summer has been absolutely DUMB! And when I say dumb, I mean it stank! As in "stupid, dumb, boring -hate it!" How's that for a good attitude? I've been sick for most of it, battling what I thought was a weird eye/sinus infection/ allergic reaction type thing. And then there was that sprained ankle that I thought I'd acquired on this Hike, which I spent weeks hobbling around on crutches because of, even though it never really seemed to heal. One day I noticed that the supposed "sprain" began to spread until every single joint in my body was swollen and painful. After some initial blood work, we learned that it was likely not a sprain I was dealing (duh!), and those eyes were not red because of allergies - but rather they were both connected and perhaps a sign of something more serious. The preliminary diagnosis was Lupus. For days and days I tried to come to terms with that. Then opinions seemed to change to that of Rheumatoid arthritis. Most recently a specialist in Calgary has calmed many of my anxieties and told me that I definately have a type of arthritis, though hopefully a much milder and more manageable form than we initially feared. We need to wait for test results before ruling other things out and confirming what this is, but I feel a renewed sense of hope now that we are in the process of figuring this out.


Thankfully, the pain I felt for the past couple of weeks that once felt so debilitating, is now subsiding and life is feeling more and more like "normal" to me again. I have learned a few important lessons about myself through this experience that I hope not to forget. I have to admit it was a bit disappointing to realize how quickly I lost all desire to be optimistic as soon as I no longer enjoyed the comfort and conveniences that I had taken for granted up until now. In short, I have handled life like an absolute chicken. And not a cute little chicken like this:

But rather, a down right, selfish, coward of a chicken. It was a difficult realization for me that I too easily allow FEAR to take over and control how I respond to things. I would like to think that I'm not the type of person who would buckle so quickly under pressure, but I suppose moments like this reveal to us a bit of who we really are. Fortunately, I managed to let only those closest to me see me at my lowest. You know - John, the kids, my brother and sisters, a few of my "luckier" neighbors, oh yeah and my visiting teaching companion and let's see...oh anybody else who happened to ask my how I was at any given moment. There is nothing like being discreet eh! Can you say BIG BABY? I have spent many days trying to FOCUS on the true sources of strength in my life, and despite the fact that I've let this little blip consume so much of our family time lately - there have been some great moments in between that are definitely worth mentioning:




School began this past week! The biggest excitement this year has got to be the fact that Sam has now officially entered the wonderful world of kindergarten. My sister Jewel was so kind to take Sam to school each day this week for me, so I spent most of each day imagining that Sam had perhaps grown out of his rambunctious behaviour that was so typical of him at preschool. However, on Friday I talked with his teacher, who kindly and politely mentioned that Sam sure is "a very busy and silly boy." For example, there was Wednesday when I made the mistake of sending a banana in his lunch box for snack. Naturally, this meant that he had to act like a MONKEY for the rest of the day! There is a part of me that is tempted to just have Jewel drop him off and pick him up indefinitely. I'd rather not know how things are going!

Abigail was SOO excited to begin grade 2, especially because she now gets to have my Aunt Karen as her teacher. She proudly comes home and exclaims that she is the only one who gets to call her teacher "Aunt Karen" while all the other kids have to simply say, "Mrs. Toone!" Abby came home discouraged one day though- because she just wasn't sure if she wanted to remain a member of the BOY HATERS CLUB. For a moment I was touched by her all inclusive sense of kindness, but in the end I encouraged her to continue hating those boys - for just a few more years!




The start of school also marks the end of John's Time off which is always hard for me to come to terms with. September is by far the busiest month for us. Not only does John go back to work, but he immediately begins coaching volleyball which always makes for a hectic time. This year he will likely be even busier then ever as he was recently called to be the Young Men's President in our ward. That is September in our family for ya, and you know what... it really is not that bad. John juggles things well, and I have a renewed desire to be more supportive(ish) of all that he needs to do.

Jessica has felt dreadfully left out this past week as every body else leaves for the day with bag lunches and book bags in tow. I've had to appease her with promises of future walks to the park, mornings reading books, and lots of crafts! She seems to have accepted all of the above and asks me every five minutes if it is time now for her "Special Mom School" to begin.




Little Nate has begun walking! His steps are limited to under a dozen at the moment, and they are still shy and unsteady - but he is taking those steps - and his eyes light up EVERY time he manages to walk further then he did before!


Yesterday we drove out to Waterton for the first time in weeks and weeks! It was packed, and John and I resolved to never go out there during Labor Day weekend again. Still though- it felt good to be in the mountains again, even if we did have to share them with hundreds of other people. John took the kids out onto the lake and they managed to find a spot that was secluded enough for them to catch a fish. I sat along the shore and watched the people around me, and tried to listen for Sam and Abby's excited shouts that floated across the water every time they got even a bite. The leaves are just barely beginning to change color and I am looking forward to a lot of beautiful days out there this fall. September and October are by far the two BEST months in Waterton!

Our Sunday schedule has changed and today we were finished church by 11:30 am. Can I hear an AMEN to that! It was glorious. We spent the afternoon napping, reading, eating, painting together, and soon we will settle down with a bowl of popcorn to watch Americas Funniest Home Videos before the kids go to bed. Can a day get any better than that?

Today I'm feeling especially grateful for all of the blessings in my life. For siblings and family who are always there for us. For kids who make me forget myself, and for a steady rock solid husband who sees and knows all my faults, yet never holds that against me! Now is that love or is that love!

Have a great Holiday Monday!!

Happy Birthday to a Real Jewel

I just wanted to send a little love out to my sister today who just happens to be having a birthday! She's a little messed up though and thinks for some reason that she is turning 34.

She's not. But I think she's gotten her age wrong for the past few years - so let's just let her go with it, shall we?

Happy "34th" Jewel!!!

In honor of her birthday I wanted to share with you some of the things that make Jewel special to me .   

First there is -  Jewel the COOK:

I have to say Jewel's cooking ability started out sort of rocky. My first memory of her in the kitchen was as a kid when she had the great idea to make home made corn chowder. Here is what it consisted of:

Milk.
Corn.
Salt and Pepper
The end.

Despite that, she has fortunately become a most excellent cook/baker. I mean check out this cake she made me for my birthday this year. Jewel is ALWAYS making something yummy and luckily, because I live a mere block away I get to enjoy some of that.

Some of my favorite dishes she makes include her yummy buns. Her REAL Home made corn chowder, her chicken noodle soup and she makes The. Best. Scalloped Potatoes. I'm not exaggerating when I say that each and every pregnancy of mine has been made endurable because of the meals she'd bring to my family on a regular basis. You'd be surprised at how much love can be packed into a simple casserole!   I remember particularly one evening during my most recent pregnancy.   The kids were at the table eating and I was in bed whining.  Down the hall I could hear Abby's voice ask Dad where the yummy food came from, to which John answered - Auntie Jewel.   After a brief pause Abby said, "that auntie Jewel sure does take care of us!" 

Jewel The Aunt:

I feel sorry for all of the little kids in the world who do not get to have Jewel for an Aunt.    She just has this way with kids.   Not only does she go out of her way to treat all of the kids in her life special but she can get them to do anything ANYTHING with out even having to ask twice.    (I wonder what that would be like)   If I tell Abby to practice the piano - no dice.  If Jewel tells Abby to practice the piano it is as good as done.    If I try to get medicine into a sick baby - no dice.   Jewel manages to get it in them without even having to SIT on them or anything.   I could spend 5 months trying to potty train my kid - no dice.   Jewel just has to ask nicely and it is as good as done.   It actually really bugs me sometimes.     Just kidding.   Well, no I'm not.

Jewel the MOM:

When it comes to motherhood Jewel knows how to do it.  She is always finding little ways to show her kids she loves them.   I mean, how many moms do you know that will catch a snake during a morning run and carry it home to her daughter?    I obviously don't understand what love is, because I would NEVER do that!    One of the things that I really admire about Jewel is how she incorporates traditions into so much of what they do.    Every celebration is a big deal to them.   AND her kids happen to have the most creative tooth fairy EVER - and I'm starting to wonder if Jewel might have something to do with that too.    

Not only is Jewel a great mom to her kids, but she also plays a Mother like role in my own life.   Ever since my mom passed away - Jewel has filled those shoes in a lot of ways.  When I am sick - she takes care of me.  When I don't know how to do something - she does it for me.    When I need advice - she has the answers.   Have I mentioned that I'm glad I live down the street from her?

Jewel the CRAFTER:  

Jewel is addicted to sewing and is constantly whipping some cute thing up to give to some lucky person. Without Jewel, we'd never enjoy home made pickles, salsas, jellies, relish, peaches, and pears.   Without Jewel, my son would not have a black superhero cape to wear as he rids the world of chaos.   ...Or I suppose - creates chaos.   

I guess if there was one thing I would complain about in regards to my sister it is that you absolutely Can NOT watch a movie with her.   She talks through the entire show and begs to be told what will happen before waiting to see for herself.    The last time I watched a movie with her was when we went to see twilight.   And believe me - that is the LAST TIME!   

  As a kid I really resented the fact that she was the one who got to be named Jewel.   I always had to hear other people say, "Oh.  You really are Such A JEWEL!"   

Hearing this usually made me ...well...want to throw up.

But that's only because  I was jealous. 

Because the truth is - she IS a JEWEL.    A real live bonafide "Jewel."   One of the definitions that I found of the word Jewel was this:

"One that is Precious or Treasured."  

Yup.   I think that sums it up!

Happy Birthday!