A Day in Our Lives

This entry is for my kids. It is mostly for journaling purposes. You know, so that years from now I'll be able to prove to my kids that THEY were in fact, the reasons behind my insanity! ha. This entry is all about a bad day... and an important lesson I learned.

It all Started on Wednesday. Jess had been showing signs of a cold. Nothing major-a mild cough, she was a bit fussy. By noon-she was bad. Her breathing was so labored. Every sound that came out of her was accompanied by a deep awful "bark", and she was warm. Trying to access the severity I checked inside her mouth hoping for teeth. I tend to blame EVERYTHING on teething. ("What, Sam is being mean?" oh he's teething. "Abby's cranky?" She's probably teething...can't they still be teething at 5?) Sure enough there were two very big molars trying to poke there way through some very swollen gums. Still, I had to admit she was sick, so I booked an appointment for her to see the doctor that afternoon. So there I was, trying to get her ready for the doctor, when all the sudden I hear an awful scream. Sam in the other room. I run to where he is-to find him holding his hand in pain. That's when I saw it. The childproof cover had been pried off one of our outlets and in it's place Sam had jammed in a couple of keys. They were pushed in deep. After several attempts to kick the keys out of the outlet (sparks were flying) I finally got them out. The keys are charred on the end, as well as the outlet cover. Sam was hysterical, Jess was screaming of her own pains, and I was recovering from a near heart attack!! It was an awful moment, and FOR THE RECORD- you should never think your kid can't get through some safety plugs!!! I should have known Sam was capable of that. Childproofing is nothing when it comes to Sam!

So needless to say I called the Dr's office back to notify them that I'd also be bringing in my son to be checked out. That was a low moment. Could I look any more incompetent? Apparently I could, because when the doctor finally listened to Jessica's breathing and observed her for a moment, he rushed us to the emergency room. After four hours being treated and watched in triage Jess was admitted for the night. I stayed with her that night, and thankfully the treatments of epinephrine did help a lot with her breathing, but it was still a very VERY long night.


As I spent the night walking with Jess, pacing, and pacing...I experienced...I don't know, a change of heart if you will. You see earlier in the evening I'd complained so vehemently about how much this all sucked. I did not want to be there. My back hurt. I was tired. There were things I needed to be doing. I was hungry. This day had totally gone all wrong. blah blah blah. Yeah I know- who's the baby hey? However, after all had calmed down, and as I held Jess in my arms, I felt completely different. Suddenly, I was so grateful to have this time alone with Jessica. Not since she was born-had we been able to spend this much time together without any interruption. Having nothing with me to work on wasn't something to complain about- it was a gift. Just me and my little girl, and singing, and back rubs, and talking to her in a way that I don't get to do very often. It was so NICE to be forced to just focus on her and what SHE was needing. Of course my mind would occasionally drift off towards Sam and I'd say a silent little prayer that he too was ok. He was-and is. In fact that little jolt he experienced has not had any effect on him. True, he may never learn to read...but...(jokes).

So we survived the night (thanks to jewel, rachel and luci who pampered us with snacks and supplies.) I survived the day and I learned something very important about Motherhood. Despite what I sometimes think- being a Mom is not about making sure that everything ALWAYS runs smoothly- because it won't. As a mom I can do my best to make sure that my kids are healthy and safe, but I can't stop the bad days from coming. As a Mom I CAN learn to just be there with them, holding them when they need to be held, kissing their little fingers when they hurt, and loving those moments too. I can learn how to let the unimportant go so that I'm able to really focus on the important.

I think that is why I have been given such great sisters, sisters-in-laws, and grandmothers in my life. God knew I'd need a lot of practice in the area of motherhood, and that is why I'm surrounded by the best examples possible. That's probably why I was given the Mother I was given. She managed to raise four kids while battling a terminal illness the whole time. Now there must have been some bad days for her (far worse then I've ever experienced-that's for sure) I can't recall an unhappy moment with her, and I think that is because she understood what she was doing for us. She wanted us to know her HAPPY, to know that she loved us and loved being our mom. That's all I really remember, and that's what really want to pass on to my kids to. I'll continue trudging through those bad days, enjoying the great days...and learning EVERY day how to be just a little bit better the next day.

So a shout out to all of you MOMS out there, and especially those that I love. I hope this weekend is a great one for you. Happy Mothers Day!!!


Three reasons why my life is great-even when everything goes wrong!